Help! Love, MOM

I may have mentioned that my daughter and I are life-long New Yorkers.

Having lived in the City (yep, THE City, iykyk) all our lives, It’s hard to miss, and to hear what others think of our town –

• HUGE, or, if the speaker is from Long Island which is another part of the N.Y.C. metro area, “The City” is ‘Uge.
• LOUD,
• CROWDED,
• EXPENSIVE,
• DIRTY.

We left out …

Friendly! A word that can honestly characterize New Yorkers especially if you ride the train with them.

My daughter spied a serendipitous meeting of dads on a subway train and the inspiration for this poem ensued. She tells me that the dads were different ages & stages of Dad-life, ethnicities, and socio-economic levels. Yet, on the train that day, united by love for their kids, the fathers:

• shared memories of now adult children,
• cheered on younger fathers,
• let strangers play with their wee-ones,
• thought forward to when the kids would be adults,
• thought back to when the adult children were kids,
• engaged emotionally and spontaneously with other fathers.

In his day, my Dad could have easily been one of them. My good father was a good gift from my Heavenly Father.

My daughter says that the mens’ meet up was one of the happiest, most wholesome and heartfelt things that she’d seen on a train.

Thus, while this poem is mostly not about fathers directly, I believe – hope? – that you’ll enjoy it.

When I write for fathers I mean the entire “dad diaspora”: uncles, grandfathers, coaches, older brothers, big brothers, mentors, pastors, teachers. You know who you are.

You have to understand. You are the ones. You inspire us.

You have to understand…

For every New York subway horror story
That makes it to the nightly news
Of strangers pushing straphangers onto tracks
Violence against the homeless
Racial slurs and vandalism

There are a dozen unreported-
Of men commiserating about the children they've raised as they watch a stranger's baby play
Of young women turning back to help the aged
And young men giving up their dignity to those who remind them of their own fathers

The pleasure of an unexpected compliment
The stranger who helps a woman and her children down to a subway platform
The tourists led to their station and watched over until they make it safe
The way we band together when there is a disaster

And the comedians who make us laugh until we cry
And the singers who make us dance until we laugh

Friends you make on your daily commute...

You have to understand
There are 190 million moments underground
189 million moments
Of everyday mundanity
Everyday wonder
Everyday exhaustion
Everyday sweetness
Everyday frustration
Everyday community
For one moment in the dark

3/11/26 8:05p in my apartment [thinking about 3 heartwarming dads on the train vs the craziness of the team]

A Blessed and Happy Father’s Day to all the Dope Dads

Kimberly